Saint Suckers

What are they and why am I talking about this subject? We’ve all known one. You find them in just about every church you go to, and some can even be found in your own family. They are those people who try to hang onto your coattails for a free ride into heaven. They don’t really want a relationship of their own with God, they want to use your walk with God to make it look like they are “religious”.

They are those people who suck the joy right out of you. It seems you are always “ministering” to them, again and again, but they never seem to mature. You tell them what Jesus can do for them, what the Bible says, but they don’t seem to “understand” it.

They are those people who need healed from the hurts of this world but don’t really want to be healed. Again, you continue to pray for them and show them what the Bible says about Jesus and how He can heal us and what we need to do in order to have a relationship with Him. But still…next time you are around them, they are still in the same place spiritually that they were last time you were with them.

My mother was one. Every church service and every church event I went to, she went also. You would think that would be a good thing. But the only reason she went was so people would think she was religious, that she was a Christian. Every time I would clap my hands, she would clap her hands. If I stood with arms raised, she would stand with arms raised. She was trying to mimic my worship of God so people would think she was worshiping Him also. But she never did anything unless she saw me doing it.

It is true that only God knows the true heart of a person, but He also gives us discernment through the Holy Spirit. It took a long time for me to realize something was off with my mom spiritually. I was so excited with what Jesus was doing in my life, that I wanted to share it with my mom. God had helped me to forgive her for abusing me, and because He was healing me, I wanted her to know that He would heal her too. She had been badly abused and molested growing up by her dad and stepmom. She continued getting into abusive relationships throughout her adult life also.

So how do I know she really hadn’t given her heart to God?

The Bible says that we will be known by our fruit. Christians are not perfect. We get mad and we lose our “witness”, we get angry and frustrated, we fight to not be offended or to harbor bitterness and unforgiveness. So how do you know when you’ve come across one of these “saint suckers”? What makes the difference? When time after time different people have counseled them and told them what the Word of God says to do in a situation and yet they remain unfruitful.

There is no sign of being healed of their past. Every time they meet someone new they have to tell what happened to them in the past. How they were beaten or insulted or “done wrong” and yet years have passed and they are still telling the same story. If you have truly given your heart to Jesus and have allowed Him access to your heart, no matter what your past, no matter what has ever happened to you, there will come a time when people will be able to see a difference in you.

You will no longer be held down by self-pity and that victim mentality, and people will be able to see that. A saint sucker is someone who needs to be counseled over and over and over and yet there is no difference in them. God does make a difference in you. He will take the sting out of the pain; He will put a joy in you that you cannot contain. Even the quietest of people will exude that joy.

Exude: convey, radiate, emanate, show

A saint sucker may put on a good show for a while but sooner or later their real fruit will begin to show. Every time you are around them, it becomes a burden to continue counseling them. By the time you leave their presence your joy and peace have been sucked right out of you. Being with them wears you out.

No matter how much you really want them to be healed or to have a right relationship with Jesus, it is never going to happen unless they have a change of heart. With family members you can’t just turn your back on them, but you have to learn to stop wearing yourself out. Satan would like nothing more than for you to extend your energy on someone that doesn’t want it.

It keeps you tied up, wearing you down, and it keeps you from ministering and sharing the Gospel to someone who really wants it. Satan would love that. It is hard to give up on somebody, knowing they will spend eternity in hell. It hurts when it is someone in your own family and it is really hard to accept. But God gave us each freewill to choose Him or not and we cannot make that choice for others.

God told me I had to continue praying for her, but He told me to stop trying to convert her and help her. She had learned how to get attention through pity, and she did not want to change. There are people who absolutely do not want a life changing event through a relationship with Jesus. What they don’t understand is the rest of the story. When our flesh dies, our spirit will live on for eternity, either with Jesus or in hell. It is your choice.

The Bible says to choose life or death. It is hard to understand why someone would deliberately choose to spend life in hell after experiencing it here on earth. Read the Word and study the difference between heaven and hell. God is not to blame for the destruction caused by the devil. Don’t blame God. See the real enemy. Let God teach you how to fight this battle of faith and choose to spend eternity with Jesus.

Revelation 21:4 And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

Revelation 21:8 “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death”. Matthew 25:46 “And these shall go away into everlasting punishment…” Revelation 14:11 “And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name.”

Many other Scriptures reveal hell as a place of darkness and gnashing of teeth. Pray that God opens the eyes of the blind and those that are deceived. Don’t give up on them, pray for them daily and intercede for them. Sometimes you have to let go and give them to God. As heartbreaking as it is, not everybody wants a relationship with God.